Categories
Betterment Simplicity

The Power of One

Something I noticed the other day whilst purchasing new tyres, pedals and shoes for my upcoming Sydney to Wollongong bicycle ride *, was that for large items in my life, I have only one.

The reason for not having more than ‘one’ is borne out of a) not having space for more than one, and b), not having a need for more than one! I think it’s greatly enhanced my sense of living simply, as well as not looking at material possessions as any sign of status. Here are some examples:

  • I have one car
  • I have one motorcycle
  • I have one bicycle
  • I have one television

I do not have the need (or space) for anything more than this, and truly believe that the more you have, the less happy you are. I am also of the belief that you should (and most of the time can) make the most of what you have without needing to have more.

Do you agree? Is ‘more than one’ causing you sadness? Let me know your thoughts!

(Edit: I felt it best to include a link to Neerav’s post Too Much Stuff: Consumption Is Not A Way of Life, it brings up a lot of great points, all underpinning my thoughts on ‘Stuff’)

* More on my bike:  I have converted the mountainbike into a road bike through road tyres and clipless pedals. I know know other people who have dedicated bikes for certain jobs, and this is OK – If I was a professional cyclist or began taking up proper mountain-biking, I may then have a need for the second bike.

Too Much Stuff: Consumption Is Not A Way of Life

Categories
Betterment

Why am I here?

Hi Everyone,

I have been looking for a great way to kick off this blog and came across an awesome post by Stephen Mills of Rat Race Trap. The post is so simple & succinct, I felt it would be a great way to start MyProactiveLife!

Sometimes just a few words say about all that needs to be said:

  1. Your life is your own damn fault.
  2. Take responsibility for it.
  3. Learn what you need to do to fix it.
  4. Take action on what you’ve learned.
  5. Enjoy the results.

– Larry Winget

Some people may be offended by the use of the word ‘damn’ in the first point – That’s Larry’s way with words, so you will need to live with it 🙂

* Some of the earlier posts on this site have been imported from my personal blog, written earlier in the year and before I had formalised the idea for MyProactiveLife.

Categories
Betterment

Life Instructions

I came across this picture a while ago and saved it to my PC, never to think about it again…until I uncovered it. I think this summarises my thoughts on what MyProactiveLife is all about! Enjoy 🙂

Life Instructions

Categories
Betterment

Taming the ugliness (an apology)

Yesterday, I had gone for a ride with my 2 boys (4 & 7) along the bike path adjacent to Botany Bay starting in Brighton, down to Dolls Point and back. For those not familiar with this bike path, it’s a shared path with pedestrians for the most part, and cuts through 5 carparks.

In one of the carparks, there was a car blocking the bike path (it looked like the driver simply drove into the carpark and just parked the car across the bike path.

Getting Mr4 to look ahead and try and react early is impossible, and I had to speed up and ensure both of the boys stopped before hitting the car. Something in me snapped. I was infuriated at how pig-headed someone could be to park across the bike path!

  • I noticed that the driver was still in the car.
  • I decided (most likely unconsciously) to let the driver know what they had done, as they probably don’t realise it.
  • I approached the car and advised the driver that they were blocking the bike path and that my sons had almost hit the car. (That’s how I wanted it to transpire), but in reality I turned ugly 🙁 . I did let the lady know she was blocking the bike path and that she should move the car to a designated parking spot, but I am not sure I came cross in a non-threatening, friendly manner. I know I then began repeating myself louder…i.e. the refuge of the defeated.
  • Afterwards, I definitely did not feel like I had done a community service – in fact, I felt like crap, mulling it over in my head for the rest of the night.

I am writing this as an open apology to the lady + her passengers who had to see/experience the ugliness that is still within me. It should have gone differently, it could have gone differently, but it didn’t – and it’s my fault. The control of the situation was completely in my hands until I snapped and went down the ugly path.

You can read more about all my 2009 goals here.

Categories
Betterment Ramblings

Freaky Stuff Happens

As some of you will know, my planned trip to New Zealand to celebrate my 10th Wedding Anniversary was thrown into chaos due to the Apocalyptic elements of Sydney weather early this morning (SMH article, Flickr photostream, BOM warning).

Whilst at the airport, the Air New Zealand staff did the best they could to explain the situation (in essence, no planes landed in Sydney to take passengers to NZ…simple really) due to limited visibility over Sydney. Our first flight (7am) was cancelled due to engineering issues so were provided a meal voucher to the food court (awesome!) and put on later flight (9:30am). At 7:30am it was apparent nothing was coming into or out of Sydney; the 9:30am was cancelled (due to weather) + the best we could do was call Reservations and make changes. I had confirmed seats on the same flight on the 24th, so decided to go home and make alternate arrangements for the rest of the trip.

Whilst on the phone with United (as the flights were booked through United, not Air New Zealand), I got to speaking to a lady by the name of “Chen” who helped me change my flights, and she was so lovely asking if it was OK to put me on hold many times. (Of course it was OK, I have worked in Customer Service and know how things work), to which I joked “sure it’s OK, I’m not going anywhere yet!” We got to chatting and I said to take her time as I understood there are delays in making changes and I didn’t mind waiting, at which point I asked her “how are other passengers/callers handling things?”

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can and the wisdom to know the difference”

She said it’d been quite a tough morning as the majority of the callers were screaming, mad, angry and frustrated that their plans were thrown into chaos as well. I explained to her that Freaky Stuff Happens beyond our control, and getting mad at others over stuff you can’t control is stupid. I explained that I had time and wasn’t going to get mad, and wonder why others would get in such a way over something they can’t control. She replied “thanks very much for sharing that with me, it helps to get through the day to hear such kind words”

I believe I helped change the way her day will pan out, But wonder where other peoples’ heads are? When the Freaky Stuff Happens, knowing what you can control and what’s beyond your control should help you best direct your energies to achieve a resolution. Screaming at customer service people over the phone for no Freaky good reason is pointless, damaging and unproductive.

To anyone out there in a customer service role ‘affected’ by today’s Freaky Stuff, I wish you all the best to get through the tough day ♥☺♥.  To all people inconvenienced by today’s Freaky Stuff, revel in the different day this is turning out to be, and don’t turn into an ugly zombie!

Categories
Betterment Exercise

Half Marathon

I am excited to be running my 1st half marathon (as part of the Sydney Running Festival) in less than 2 weeks. For someone who had not done more than a few hundred metres at a time back in May, I think it’s been pretty good going. Some people (notably friends through Facebook and Twitter) have asked why I’m doing this and what preparation I’ve had.

My lead-up to this was the 11km Sutherland2Surf, as well as the 14km City2Surf. Each week I’ve been going to 2 x 1hr Aerobic Kickboxing sessions and a 10-13km run on Fridays. I am not taking this so seriously to be locked into a training regime as my initial goal is simply to get fit! 🙂

This is one of my 2009 Goals which I had decided on back in January. I believe that pursuits such as walking/running rely less on technology and more on your own ability. Most other sports rely on other objects (balls, other players, equipment, etc.). Running really does force you to rely on yourself to get through. I am aiming to complete the Half Marathon in under 2 hours.

I decided that as I am fit and well, I’m going to see how far I can push myself whilst I have the capability to do so. It will help me understand who I am (in a physical sense) and provide me a mechanism to get fitter and relieve stress at the same time (I find running and cycling quite therapeutic 🙂 I’m also working in other ways to expand myself in the realms of thinking, creativity and relationships – I’ll share those thoughts with you soon.

I have not yet chosen my next ‘big’ goal, but will be looking to complete the goals I have set for myself for 2009. Let me know of some of your goals, or if you will also be running in the Sydney Running Festival!

Categories
Betterment Personal Development

Books I'll be reading soon!

I have always ‘had an interest’ in how we learn – how we take information in and use it to take action of some sort. I decided to look into this, and other areas of interest a little more by going on a book buying journey, which will lead me to a book reading journey soon! I have also included here books that I already own but have not yet read.

Starting with my short-list of topics I am interested with: People, Learning, Ideas, Innovation, Simplicity.

Books on my list to help me work out where to next:

  • “Career Renegade: How to Make a Great Living Doing What You Love” – Jonathan Fields
  • “Escape from Cubicle Nation: From Corporate Prisoner to Thriving Entrepreneur” – Pamela Slim

People/Learning

  • “The Mind and the Brain: Neuroplasticity and the Power of Mental Force” – Jeffrey M. Schwartz
  • “The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science” – Norman Doidge
  • “Brain Rules: 12 Principles for Surviving and Thriving at Work, Home, and School” – John Medina
  • “How We Decide” – Jonah Lehrer
  • “The Long Emergency: Surviving the End of Oil, Climate Change, and Other Converging Catastrophes of the Twenty-First Century” – James Howard Kunstler
  • “The Ruthless Leader” – Alistair McAlpine
  • “The Brain” – Richard Restak
  • “Learning and Behavior” – James Mazur

Ideas/Innovation

  • “Outliers: The Story of Success” – Malcolm Gladwell
  • “Lateral Thinking” – Edward De Bono.
  • “Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking” – Malcolm Gladwell

There’s quite a bit of reading there for the next couple of months – might be time to devote more time to reading instead of digital fiddling! I will be posting reviews as I read the books, along with recommendations & insights!

Categories
Betterment

Changing Habits – 3rd update

As you may recall, I have been on a mission to try and change some habits, starting with a greater use of my left hand. I’ve had a few more days of catching myself doing something automatically and changing something of my behaviour to help reprogram my brain. The teeth brusing, breakfast eating and mouse usage are all coming along nicely, with my left-hand use increasing and becoming easier (teeth brushing now only feels ‘partly’ weird, as opposed to freakingly weird!)

The biggest changes I’ve had over the past few days is my reaction to things that don’t go my way. There are oftentimes (when I am deep in my thoughts) that I ‘snap’ at someone or something around the house, almost always for something trivial and small. Well, I vowed to reduce the number of ‘snapping’ incidents this week, and so far I think I’m doing OK. There are still times where my subconscious (or as Steve Levinson mentioned in the comments section of the “When Is A Habit Not A Habit?” blog post, “what we do automatically“) simply takes over and before I can catch it, the snap has occured. I know this is part of the Fight vs. Flight response governed by the amygdala, but taming this and consciously making decisions more and more can only benefit my life in lots of ways, such as:

  • Keeping me motivated to stay on my current ‘fitness’ path instead of simply doing something easy like sitting in front of a ‘screen’
  • Helping reduce the amount of stress I cause in my family (by snapping less and thinking more) – this will also help me get rid of thoughts as quickly as they come
  • Helping me make better decisions in times of crisis, bad news, unexpected news, etc.

I am sure there will be other habits I can change, and the key to this seems to be ‘attention’, more-so than time. Steve mentioned:

When it comes to changing habits, I’m convinced that attention is a far more important factor than time is.

In a way, I came to this conclusion myself a couple of days ago BUT Steve put it into words. I’ll be trying to pay more attention to these things over the coming days and letting you know how successful I am. In what ways are you attempting (& succeeding?) in changing your habits? Leave your comments and let me know 🙂

Categories
Betterment

Changing Habits – Days 2-4

This is an ongoing experiement to change some of my habits, initially through relying more on my left hand to perform many tasks I’d usually do with my right hand. You can catch the first part (+ some great comments) in my Changing Habits – Day 1 post.

I have not had much trouble switching to my left hand, but am having to fight the compulsion for the right hand to take control – I’m finding when I don’t focus on the task (i.e. let my mind wander onto one of the many other things I think about), the right hand creeps in like a burglar just lying in wait to steal your goodies!

My exercise in eating is not a problem, breakfast is slower now (which is a good thing as I was gobbling down my cereal too quickly), teeth brushing is still awkward, I have yet to try writing/painting with my left hand (or either foot, for that matter – refer to the comments here for more info)

One thing I can do very very well is use my knife in my left hand – because I always have! When we were growing up, my brothers and I realised that the fork was the most powerful weapon to fend off other people stealing food from your plate – you’d want to arm your strongest hand with the fork to perform the task of defence, should a stray hand wander across your plate. I will endeavour to switch this behaviour around and use my knife/fork the ‘correct’ way to help break some habits and form new neural pathways!

This long weekend will provide some non-work activities for me to continue the experiment and broaden my habit-changing experiences!

Oh and the zucchini seeds I popped into the ground are starting to sprout! 🙂

Categories
Betterment

Changing Habits – Day 1

Spurred on by a comment from Tim Brownson on his blog topic When is a habit not a habit, I decided to document & share my thoughts on reprogramming my brain through the focused, deliberate changing of some of my everyday ‘habits’. Notably, my efforts will initially be to use my left hand more than my right (yes, I am right-handed).

There are some things which cannot be changed due to the nature of some of our technology/society (by way of example, the throttle on a motorcycle is controlled by the right hand; for efficiency, it’s easier to use my right hand to open the car door (for those that drive on the left-hand side of the road).

I initially started a few weeks back sporadically brushing my teeth using my left hand, as awkward as it was. Then I started to think about other areas of my daily life where I could do the same task, only in a different way. Here are my findings so far:

  • Teeth Brushing – with my left hand, it seems far more awkward to go side-to-side than up & down. I can brush my teeth to my satisfaction. I am more engaged with the task and often have to consciously think which way to brush next. Everything seems automatic when I use my right hand
  • Computer Mouse usage – I had toyed with using my left hand for the mouse a month or so ago but gave up after a few mins as it was just way too awkward, and I wasn’t getting much work done – my fine motor skills had deserted my left hand and taken a holiday to the Bahamas. Today, I stuck it out and began to work more efficiently than before. For those who are interested, I have only moved my mouse to the left and kept the button assignments as-is for a normal right-hand-side mouse.
  • Getting dressed – You may not realise it but most people get dressed in the same order ever day. I now consciously stop myself and ‘switch’ around the order, most easily seen when getting into/out of a pair of pants/shorts, as well as putting on socks & shoes (sub your clothing items where appropriate). (I caught myself in a habit that I had picked up more than 15 years ago – when I had a foot injury, it was easier to get my foot into/out of pants by supporting my left leg with my right hand).
  • General observations – My right hand feels like a hanger-on. It’s awkward, not really knowing what to do. Some other things I have on my list: Any kitchen-related task (pouring milk, stirring tea, chopping, etc), Opening doors (using keys). I’m also vowing to be more positive/less negative and letting little things slide, but this is a whole other topic in itself! 🙂

I’ll be trying everything in a different way for the next few days. What other things do you think I can try doing differently over the next few days?